A Tale of Two Lamps

(or the Club Trip to France July 2008)

Earlier in the year club members Derek Butler, Andrew Prior and John Soones approached me [Sandra - ed], volunteering to organise a club trip (excellent!). After a lot of deliberation on where in the world to go the decision was made.

I would like to thank Derek, Andrew , John and Simon Mortimore for all their hard work and involvement in this trip. Derek recounts the story below in a Tale of Two Lamps.

Dawn 4th July 2008. The AFC Expeditionary Force assembled for their final briefing at RAF Booker. 5 Planes and 14 crew committed to the cause - The Toulouse Raid. Mission - target a departure time the following day for a tour bus to explore and acquire the secrets of the Airbus A380 at Toulouse. Forward base that night was in deepest France location La Rochelle.
The planning for this mission started months earlier and happened because of a careless comment to Agent S (codename Sandra). The careless question that will cost your time is,
'Any long weekend club trips planned?'
'No', replied S.
'Why don't you plan one?'
So we did.

Three days, Friday to Sun, to visit the Airbus factory in Toulouse, France (well at least this was the cover story) - any volunteers? 18 initially said 'yes' and that meant 7 planes; but things were to change that July morning.

Pouring over the meteorological entrails it was okay to fly, but the return on Sunday looked worrying. Nerves cracked at this point. One crew pulled out of the mission - that's okay, we're all volunteers - and instead took a day mission to the Paris area. The private planes also withdrew with honour.
This left 3 Warriors and the Dakota; 11 crew, still enough for the mission.

We climbed into the sky aware of our history (and the fact that S was watching) so textbook departures. We planned to coast out over the Isle of Wight taking the VFR Recommended Route via Kathy to Mike Papa and Cherbourg. GODAK was loaded with a crew of four. We went for a transit through the Southampton zone. Silver tongued Pilot Officer AP, who can get you any zone transit without delay (including Heathrow) was in the crew. The mistake was that he was in the back so we had to orbit a bit before we were cleared through. We RIS'd and RAS'd, vectored and maintained, making my happy hours under the watchful gaze of Agent S doing my IMC pay off. Even in real cloud for a bit before finally bursting into clear skies over the coast.

Across the channel we headed where at some point (and only on the map) the EU became the EU. That is the same but different or put another way where European Unity becomes European Uniformity, so at a line on our maps IMC skills are stripped from us.
The beckoning French coast ahead offered lower cloud than our current altitude so we descended to maintain VFR. ATC was supportive routing for a fly past Mont St Michel and on to Rennes. All well, one after another planes arrived for a refuel of both plane and pilots. Except one. They had taken another route. Were Pilot Officer M and Pilot Officer A up to something which none of us knew about?

For now none the wiser the rest of us took off from Rennes with a fresh pilot at each of the controls little suspecting we were being sucked into a cunning French trap.

The shorter journey to La Rochelle with lower cloud base was uneventful. The approach proved interesting, winding along the line of a dual carriageway through the middle of the town to line up for final. After landing, we called for refuel as we knew the next day would mean an early departure and the airfield plates said La Rochelle fuel would not be open.
It was then the trap was sprung and we finally encountered French Resistance.

To understand the next bit you need to know that the secret of success for a weekend French mission lies in planning the logistics in such a way that you arrive at open fuel dumps. Essentially there are hardly any and the times shown, be warned, are UTC so local time can be a couple of hours different. But also there's BFT and AFT to worry about. That's Before French Time and After French Time. These are arbitrary corrections and work in the following way. BFT operates as you arrive at French airfields - everything you want has just closed Before you've arrived. AFT operates when you want to depart a French airfield, everything you want opens After the time you need to leave. At La Rochelle BFT had just been applied - therefore no fuel. And AFT was being applied the next morning. The French trap had closed.

GODAK was in trouble. Having four up we had to limit our fuel uplift at Rennes (and that was before any French cuisine) so we could not get to Toulouse without fuel. The Warriors, more lightly loaded and less thirsty, could make the objective without refuelling on the outbound leg. Pilot officers M and A were still not to be seen.

We moved out to our overnight camp. A rest and a taste of the food delights of La Rochelle beckoned. IBIS hotels were basic and clean and a good bet as they did not penalise for late cancellations. Something we would soon need to take advantage of.

The harbour area is a delight. We found an open air restaurant and booked a table large enough for all the officers to be together. Food was ordered but we were still looking at two empty seats. Where were M&A? They eventually arrived during the first course, their more easterly route had put them into poorer weather, so they had to turn around at one stage and reroute.

Pilot officer JS was carrying the portable communications unit so we could make contact with HQ - well at least the internet. The meteorological entrails were not boding well for the next day - the fuel issue was becoming a secondary concern.

Later that July evening the BAFC Expeditionary Force assembled in the lobby of the IBIS hotel to plan their next step. Operation Toulouse was being threatened and a tactical withdrawal was on the table. It was decided to make a final decision at 0730hrsUTC/BST/BFT/AFT the next morning.

Dawn on Saturday was okay, but the meteorology was not. There was a weather barrier to Toulouse, not an issue for those with IMC, but we were all deskilled due to the fact we were in the uniformity part of the EU. But the bigger issue was the deteriorating conditions in the English Channel and across the UK. The BAFC Exp. Force could have been stranded on foreign soil for days if we continued. We decided to return.

Pilot Officer AP was delegated to silver tongue the Toulouse contacts. The rest of us planned our routes back but little did we know M&A had their own mission planned. Returning to the airfield AFT applied and eventually we were refuelled and departed. Uneventful flight back except the wind was getting up and offered a strong, gusting cross wind for 17 at Booker. The landings were challenging and 'noticed' under the ever watchful gaze of S.

And what of M&A?
They arrived much later with a tale of daring do. They had gone off in a taxi, faced road blocks and battled with protesters, to acquire what may well have been the real goal of Mission Toulouse. They were much delayed in their return to La Rochelle airfield only to discover BFT was about to be applied to the fuel service. Now you have to know Pilot Officer A and his peace time occupation but put it this way, the Frenchman didn't stand a chance. The long arm of the law may have been extended whilst Pilot Officer M grabbed the plane. They refuelled and returned just in time as the weather closed in across the UK for the next two days as predicted.
And the goal for their mission? All we are allowed to say is that's why I called this A Tale of Two Lamps (or was it Lampshades?)

P.S. Memorandum to all Historians.
Like all stories of legendary missions the way of telling may have a certain style but the facts are true. All this happened thanks to Agent S - Sandra's wonderful support - the intelligence dossier she produced for each crew was a tour de force. Thank you.

These weekends are really enjoyable and like all flying it's all in the travelling not the arriving. They are a great opportunity to try new things and meet new people who have the same passion.
Thanks to PO Andrew P for the Airbus idea and all his effort in co-planning. To PO Simon M for doing his intelligence gathering on the French bases and to PO John S for his inspirational presence, well at least his inspiration.
Also thanks to Tim and the club in all their support particularly in easing the final demands from the French end on our no show - very much appreciated.

PO Derek Butler